We all wish someone could save us but only you can save yourself.
~
THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOU
I hate the way you
hold rolled pieces of
death between your fingers–
as if they keep you alive.
I hate the way you pretend
not to care.
I hate the way
your eyes shift
when there is a fact
you cannot admit.
I hate the way you
look at me.
I hate the way you hold
your hurt, smother them
in cheap plasters, tiny deaths,
drown yourself in air.
I hate the way you live.
I hate the way you don't.
~
4 DAYS AND 20 BROKEN RIBS
You are not the boy who
falls in love. You are the boy who stays
up at midnight, admiring the bone
fragments left on your bedroom wall,
ignoring the blood left at the door. You are
the boy who revels in the crack
of dark and the cries of
the broken. But
I have never known you
as you know yourself. And if
what you said was true, if you are
only you when you are with me,
then
you are the boy who hides
in a corner at midnight, cowering
in the dark to blind yourself
from fear. You are the boy who cuts
himself open in the face of love, who
jumps off his hollowness into faith alone.
You are the boy who is afraid
to be afraid, yet unafraid
to fight.
There is a wake of blood behind
you. But if one day you decide to turn
around, all you will see is your
self. Dead.
~
THE HUMAN HEART WEIGHS 300 GRAMS
What is the measure of
a human heart? How much is it
worth? If it's broken, does it
weigh more or less? Is it worth more
or less?
You think it's worth nothing
now, but it's not. It's worth as much
as the sunset you saw yesterday, and
the sunrise you need to see
tomorrow.
~
DO NOT KILL YOURSELF FOR LOVE
I wish I could plant
flowers in your lungs for you. Watch
as they blossom and grow in the dirt you
amply provide them with.
I wish I could water
them everyday, wash away the soot
the ash the tar the drugs and leave
only rain and morning dew.
But the fact is: I can't. You can.
It might be winter now but after
winter there is always
always spring.
~
THERE IS DARKNESS AND THERE IS LIGHT
I
We first met in the darkness.
But together, we waited
for the light. The sky stained
pink with hope.
II
We next met in the light
between sea and sky. But darkness
came, and the waves were purple
with borrowed time.
III
This time we tried to shed light
on darkness but instead got lost in
our own. There is no colour for
abandon, only shame.
IV
Where the door was open, now
it is locked. I left in the darkness
and we are all stained white
with salt.
~
WE ARE ALL PILLARS OF SALT
I should've learnt by now – to flee
and never look back, but we all do things
we aren't supposed to, and we all
love who we tell ourselves
we shouldn't.
It is a human condition, an affliction
of the soul. To feel fear but not
run from it, to feel pain but find nowhere
to hide. To survive
by killing ourselves.
We all look back.
We all regret.
You are not alone.
~
WE ARE ALL SINNERS, AFTER ALL
In this space are
the words I cannot
bring myself
to say.
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